From the moment that you have seen this girl, you can’t stop thinking about her day and night. Only one question circles your mind : Should I tell her I like her?
We’ll help you settle this right here right now.
But first, we need you to ask yourself some questions !!!
Is she single? Ask yourself: should I tell her if she’s already with someone else?
Absolute No. If someone you like is already in a relationship, please don’t try to ruin things for her and her partner.
Here are 2 reasons of what might go wrong if you do so:
1 – She will most probably reject you
She has already found her “Might be” Soulmate. This means that she most probably won’t accept any attempts from any one who tries to get closer to her.
Unless she loves from long ago, then gave up and had to go with someone else (which is a scenario that is most likely going to happen in movies but not in real life), you’re most likely going to be rejected.
2 – You might face tremendous amount of hate
If two people are happy with each other, then why try to ruin it by confessing your feelings to one of them? What good will that bring either you or them?
The couple might not consider your actions to be innocent anymore and they may feel threatened by your presence nearby.
Alright, now that we have got this out of the way, let’s move to the other questions.
If I barely know her, then should I tell her I like her?
What makes you like her in the first place? Is it the looks? Those will fade out sooner than you would expect.
I’m not saying that you shouldn’t go for the looks, what I’m saying is that you shouldn’t let looks be the deciding factor on whom you are going to spend the rest of your life with.
Just think about it, would you really want to gamble your WHOLE LIFE just because you have seen a beautiful girl and you can’t resist immediately telling her how you feel?
That won’t be a wise decision at all. This DOES NOT MEAN that you shouldn’t tell her, it means that now is not the time to tell her.
What you need to do instead is approach her politely and get to know who she is.
It doesn’t hurt if your partner is both beautiful from the outside and from the inside, however, make sure that you get your priorities right.
Why is it extremely important to get to know her before taking any further steps?
Here’s a quick fact for you.
39% of marriages in the united states will end up in divorce according to this business insider article. You really want to make sure that you’re one of the 61% who will save themselves so much trouble in life.
Your decision right now might be the deciding factor on whether you’ll end up facing divorce at some point in your life or you’ll end up having a great life with a lifetime partner.
If you don’t know her, try to approach her in a polite way, feel free to show her all the interest that you want, that would be awesome actually.
But don’t just tell her how you feel right away. You will tell her one day, but not today. First get to know her, then you’ll proceed accordingly.
Now that I got to know her, should I tell her?
At this point, you know her very well. You’ve gone out together several times, spent some time together, hopefully laughed and cried together.
You’ve seen her happy, you’ve seen her sad, you’ve seen her angry, you’ve seen her upset.
How did she react in each of these states? Is there anything that is alarming to you?
If there was any action from her that made you question the things that you know about her, then you still need more time to figure that part out.
You now know her to the point that it’s not awkward to let her know that some of her actions were alarming to you.
She might be kind enough and decide to explain her point of view of the actions that you flagged as alarming. This would be the best scenario.
If she decides to explain things, it means that you’ll be able to solve future issues together by taking time to explain your actions to each other. That’s a great sign.
You on the other hand will need to be flexible with what you flag as alarming. Each of you might come from different environments, share different mentalities and have different life experiences, and you’ll have to respect that.
There’s no way you will agree together on everything you encounter in life. It’s just how human’s nature works, we disagree on things. But when we do so, we better be rational in our approach.
Now that I 100% know who she is both from the inside and the outside, should I tell her?
When you get to know her and you’re sure that this is a person that you would like to spend your rest of your life with, the question changes from should I tell her to when and how to tell her.
When should I tell her?
RIGHT NOW, just do it. Go ahead, you’ve found the love of your life.
How to tell her?
Don’t just do it over the phone, make sure it’s a face to face meeting. This might be scary to you, but the beautiful things are on the other side of fear.
Instead of looking at your screen and typing your feelings by touching the glass of a device, it will be much better to put your device away, look her in the eye for a few seconds and let her know how you feel.
I believe that by now, the article should have answered your question, however, I won’t stop her. I really need to say a few more things about what may happen next.
How to deal with her response.
What if she said yes?
If she’s happy as much as you are with what you have just told her, then all of what I can say here is CONGRATULATIONS. May you live happily ever after.
I also would like to note here that you shouldn’t feel sorry for taking your time before you confess your feelings.
After all, “What comes easy won’t last” so don’t feel bad for taking your time to decide.
Taking time to get to know her might even make her trust you more as she now knows that her new partner is someone who is capable of making rational decisions no matter the amount of pressure that is put on him.
Even though you were eager to tell her your feelings right away, you decided to keep control of yourself and do what’s best for both of you.
That says a lot about you and the way you handle the life events that are thrown at you.
What if she said no?
If she says no, it’s not the end of the world.
It will hurt a lot, but keep in mind that you have done the right thing and that time is a healer.
Even if she said no, you still have made the best decision you could ever make, because the question of whether she also wants to be with you or not is now answered.
You now know that you have to move on with your life. There are still infinite options to explore in life.
What you can do is try to put away what reminds you of her, go out with friends and talk to them about it, and just wait for time to do what it does best, which is heal your past wounds.
My last words on the subject would be: No matter what her decision was, you should be proud of yourself that you had the courage to confess your feelings to someone that you like.
I would like to mention that I’ve written an article on a similar topic if you’d like to check it out. The article suggests that if you have a crush on someone, you should definitely tell them.
The article that you have just read however approaches the way that you should tell them and I hope that it was helpful.
If you have any other thoughts on the matter, then we would love to hear them in the comments section. Feel free to express your thoughts down there.